Out of the Mouths of Babes

I’m not usually the first person to catch on to a new fad or to try a new food, but I’m guessing I may be the first person in Ashland to have attended a Christmas party in 2011 (along with my husband Larry). It’s a tradition in Salvation Army circles to have a Christmas party for the region’s officers (clergy) and their families prior to the start of the kettle season (kicking off on November 17). So two days before Halloween we attended a Christmas party complete with a decorated tree and Christmas carols.

Each year the question arises – what will the after-dinner entertainment be? We’ve groaned our way through some pretty awful magicians and jugglers over the years, while last year’s improv Babushka drama starring conscripted audience members was definitely not-ready-for-primetime. So it was with a less-than-positive attitude that I put my napkin on the table and awaited the dreaded evening entertainment.

But, I must admit, it was brilliant. Based loosely on the Newlywed game format, selected officers’ children were asked a series of questions, and then the parents had to guess what their children’s answers were. Who spends more time in the bathroom, mom or dad? (Mostly dad, including one who takes his computer into the bathroom). What’s your parent’s favorite television show? (American Pickers, football, House Hunters). Who drives faster, Mom or Dad? (Most got that one correct). Who gets lost the most? (I’ll let you guess that answer).

One question asked about a parent’s hidden talent. One mom even demonstrated her daughter’s correct answer, as she invents funny voices for each of the household pets. Another father (the one with the computer in the bathroom) was described as a good survivor. “If he was dropped off in New York City without any money, he’d find a way to survive.” But it was a ten-year-old girl who explained her dad’s talent best: “He takes care of poor people.”

The question that took the most thought for the parents to answer was this: If your parent wasn’t a Salvation Army officer, what would he or she be? One daughter responded, “A clown at Kentucky Fried Chicken.” A few parents answered, “A teacher.” A young adult son suggested that his dad would be a loan shark, while his dad rephrased that to be a salesman. Looking for a used car, anyone? But two answers from the children were especially poignant.

Both were from 8 year old boys, that age where you never know what will come out of their mouths - or their pockets. The first, with a bit of help from the audience to articulate his idea, was that his mom would be a professional student. She has been working on her master’s degree, and her love for learning translated into her son’s vision for her.

The second response tugged at my heartstrings, as the young boy said that if his mom wasn’t a Salvation Army officer she would stay at home and take care of him. I remembered those days in our family, when we’d be rushing out the door in the morning and then dragging the kids to the center after school, struggling to have dinner together at our dining room table more than a night or two each week. We had busy assignments during those years, and one of the children had to get sick before I’d stay at home and take care of them. Oh, that I could recapture a few of those days.

As I’ve thought about that evening, I am amazed at how well most of those kids knew their parents – and wonder how well my children (now adults) know me. If my sons were asked similar questions about me or their dad, would we share the same answers? We’d probably agree on who gets lost the most and on favorite television shows, but do they know my heart?

We don’t get a do-over in life. We can’t change yesterday, but we do have today and hopefully tomorrow, and this quasi-newlywed game has challenged me to check out my priorities in that light. “Out of the mouths of babes.”